Sunset Tan After Dark

If you're a sucker for fake tans, fake boobs and fake hair, Les Deux was the place to be this past Wednesday night. Oh wait, isn't that every Wednesday night? The "stars" of E!'s Sunset Tan came out for the show's season 2 premiere, and with the exception of a few of the ladies, I thought I was looking at pictures from a porn convention.

The girls in pink are Marcia Warren and Kendra Warren, and honestly, I don't even know what they're famous for - they make Phoebe Price look like an impeccably dressed B-lister.

Below them are the Olly Girls (a.k.a. Molly Shea and Holly Huddleston), who aren't exactly examples of classy, sophisticated young women, but hey, they tried. I want to smack myself for saying this, but Molly and Holly are regulation hotties, and I can see why they're so popular on the show - guys love them and girls love to hate them. However, that does not save them from my fashion disaster list.

Molly's polo shirt dress would have looked cute with a pair of flats during the day, but NOT on the red carpet! And don't even get me started on her shoes - it looks like someone took a perfectly nice pair of wedges and let their toddler bedazzle and finger paint all over them.

Holly's tatas are out of control and her top looks like something from the Wet Seal clearance bin. Don't start sending me hate mail - there is nothing wrong with Wet Seal, but this busty blonde should know better than to wear a $9.99-looking shirt to a "red carpet event."

Thought I was done bitching about these girls? Think again! I could write a short story about the fashion catastrophe that is Jenae Alt, but I will try to keep it to one paragraph. First of all, she's wearing white shoes with a black dress. Second, her dress has a studded leather collar. I could just keep on listing things, but I'd lose track of the numbers. Her hair and makeup are excessive, and her blue steel face is burning a hole right through my computer screen. Her pose proves that she has great balance in heels, but other than that, I am not impressed with her at all! Fashion fail!